Maybe I just need to complain more often

166.2 when I stepped on the scale this morning!!!



Not sure if it's coincidence or the fact that I ate normal meals yesterday. I'm assuming the latter. My stomach felt a little off for most of the day, so I kind of forced myself to eat, but after a nap I felt a lot better. I'm ridiculously excited I'm 1.2 pounds away from where I want to be. I still have five days of Phase One left, and it would be really awesome if I could get closer to 160. I have no idea when the last time was I weighed that. Sometime between graduating college and my wedding. It was definitely before my wedding because I was 167 for that and thought that was pretty good. honestly I didn't have a scale for a lot of years, so I really have no idea what I weighed at any point from roughly '99 to '03.

And still nothing

This is getting ridiculous. So I ranted Sunday about weighing in at 169. Yesterday I was 168, now today I'm 169. I do not get it. I didn't cheat at all yesterday. I'm so annoyed. Although, I didn't eat consistently either. I was in a major funk all day and just kind of grazed instead of ever sitting down and having a real meal. So my plan for today is to eat three real meals and have two snacks. I had eggs for breakfast and may have a couple turkey sausages. Lunch I think I'm going to have tuna salad, and dinner is slated to be smothered turkey burgers. My morning snack will be a thing of string cheese, my afternoon snack I'll have some almonds. And I'll drink plenty of water today. I'm supposed to meet my friend Dani at the gym to work out this morning, but my youngest seems a bit off and had diarrhea yesterday, so I don't know if we should go. I hate to miss because I haven't been since Thursday (and that was a super lame workout), but I don't want to leave him in the child center if he's sick. I'm supposed to meet her in an hour, so I'll see how he's doing in 30 minutes I guess.

Frustrated

So I'm one week in to Phase One of the South Beach Diet, and I'm down seven pounds. But I'm up 0.2 pounds from yesterday. Plus my starting weight was slightly inflated since it was post vacation and post carb binge. My weight had been hovering between 170 and 172 pre-vacation, and this morning I weighed in at 169, compared to 168.8 yesterday. So really I feel like I've hardly lost anything at all, and I'm really annoyed. I'm just so tired of being stuck around 170. I really want to get down to 165 so if I do have a bad couple days with a swing of 1-3 pounds I'm still in the 160s. is that too much to ask?! Honestly I expected to be at 165 by this point in Phase One and kind of secretly hoped I'd be down in the low 160s by the time the two weeks were done. Why am I depriving myself so much if it's not even doing that much? Granted I did cheat a little last night and had a glass of wine, but my husband has been having wine all week and still dropping weight. He even went out drinking with a buddy last night and was down almost a pound this morning. WTF?! What is wrong with my body that I can't just get to the weight I want to be? I'm really annoyed, and it's shaping up to make today a very grumpy day. Why the fuck should I keep denying myself carbs for another week when it's barely being effective?

Here's to hoping that my ranting and pessimism somehow leads to me dropping 4+ pounds in the course of the next week. I hate being a fat ass.

uh oh

We got an ice cream cake for my oldest son's birthday party last month from an awesome local ice cream shop, and along with the cake they gave us a quart of ice cream. They call it Cookie Monster...it's cotton candy flavored (blue colored) ice cream with crushed Oreos and chocolate chip cookie dough mixed in. I had forgotten we had the quart left...until I went out to the garage freezer to look for some chicken tenders I thought were out there and spotted the container. Sigh. talk about willpower...you have no idea how badly I want to go dig a spoon into that bad boy.

But, that won't get me skinny.

Double sigh.

marathon anxiety

So I'll be honest. I'm starting to freak out about my upcoming half marathon. It's still more than five months away, but when I was typing out a training schedule, the idea that I'm going to run 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13 miles really freaked me out. I mean, that's insane, right?! To run that far?! Why run that far when you could just drive? I think it's about 13 miles from my house to the airport. I'd never run to the airport!! But, I've signed up and paid the money to run 13 miles through Disneyland and Anaheim, so I have to do it. Granted I haven't even really started training for it officially, but I'm still freaked out. The most I've run so far is 30 minutes straight, which honestly I'm pretty pleased with considering January 1st I couldn't run at all.

We actually just got back from a trip to southern California, and we spent a day at Disneyland. It was crazy to think that the next time I'm there I'll be running through it. But it did kind of get me excited for it. I mean, really, how cool is it to get to run through Disneyland?!?! Okay, not as cool as spending the day there riding the rides, but it's still something not many have done.

back in the no carb saddle again

I've decided that in an effort to get down to my goal weight of 165, I'm going back to Phase One of the South Beach Diet for two weeks. the husband is doing it with me so he can try to finally break under 200 pounds. We started yesterday, and somehow it was a lot easier than I remember it being any other time. I did forget once and had a handful of popcorn my oldest was eating while we watched a movie (mmmm...salty, buttery popcorn...), but I thought that was pretty good for only slipping up once on my first day. And it's something that's allowed in Phase Two, so I didn't feel too badly about it. I planned out three meals for each day and snacks, so I'm hoping that helps. Today I need to do some food preparing so we're ready for the rest of the week...some egg muffin things for breakfasts, and I'm going to make up a batch of black bean soup that will be good for lunches. Lunch is what I struggle with the most, especially for what I can send along with my husband, so I really need to be good about planning those out.

Is it too much to ask?!

Just one week I'd like to be able to stick to my running plan. Is that too much to ask?! I don't know why it never seems to work out that way. I thought I was on track this week. I ran Sunday and Tuesday at the gym and planned to get up this morning and go before everyone was awake. Then yesterday I felt like I was getting a cold. This morning I woke up about an hour before my alarm was set to go off and decided the extra hour of sleep was more important because my throat hurt and I was pretty congested. I'm going to hit the gym to run this afternoon with Jen and Michelle, so at least it won't be a total loss. I just miss my morning runs when it's quiet and the sun is just starting to peek up.